Bisexual Visibility Week | History and Pride

This flag is a part of my Patchwork Pride flag collection, which can be found by clicking on this photo.

What is Bisexuality?

The term Bisexual has changed considerably in its meaning since its inception. “in 1859, anatomist Robert Bentley Todd first used the term ‘bisexuality' to refer to the possession of ‘male’ and ‘female’ physical characteristics in the same body – today, we might understand this as being intersex” (Robinson Rhodes, 2022), not at all relating to romantic attraction. 

Robinson Rhodes explains that “[b]y the beginning of the twentieth century, this meaning had shifted to focus on a combination of ‘masculine’ and ‘feminine’ gendered characteristics – what today we would describe as androgyny. The modern meaning of bisexuality, which describes sexual and/or romantic attraction rather than sexed or gendered characteristics, only developed in the 1910s. However, for many years the different meanings of bisexuality were used at the same time and sometimes in the same texts” (2022).

In the mid to late 1900s the term Bisexuality began to gain traction and widespread use, particularly in the United Kingdom (Robinson Rhodes, 2022). At this point the understood definition of Bisexuality was 

The definition given for bisexuality below is one that has been prevalent since the 1990s, eradicating the myth that bisexuality is an identity that is exclusively related to the gender binary. It was promoted by Robyn Ochs, the editor of Bi Women Quarterly, who credits the Bay Area activists for teaching her this more expansive definition of the term (Berg, 2020). 

Bi: A shorthand abbreviation, usually for Bisexual, but could also stand for Bigender or Biromantic.

Biromantic: “an individual who acknowledges in themselves the potential to be romantically attracted to people of more than one gender, not necessarily at the same time, in the same way, or to the same degree. Individuals who identify as biromantic aren't necessarily sexually attracted to the same people to whom they're romantically attracted” (PFLAG).

Bi+: A abbreviation used as an umbrella term, “encompassing people who recognize and honor their potential for sexual and emotional attraction to more than one gender (bisexual, pansexual, omnisexual, fluid, queer, asexual, and other free identifiers)” (BRC).

Bigender: “A term used to identify a person whose gender identity encompasses two genders, (often man and woman, but not exclusively) or is moving between being two genders”

Biphobia: “Animosity, hatred, or dislike of bisexual people which may manifest in the form of prejudice or bias” (PFLAG).

Bisexual: “a person who acknowledges in themselves the potential to be attracted–romantically, emotionally and/or sexually–to people of more than one gender, not necessarily at the same time, in the same way, or to the same degree” (Ochs via PLFAG). ​

Kinsey Scale: “Drs. Alfred Kinsey, Wardell Pomeroy, and Clyde Martin developed the Heterosexual-Homosexual Rating Scale—more commonly known as “The Kinsey Scale.” First published in Sexual Behavior in the Human Male (1948), the scale accounted for research findings that showed people did not fit into exclusive heterosexual or homosexual categories” (Indiana University).

Monosexual: “a term used to describe individuals exclusively attracted to one gender or sex” (Fuller, Donnelly, 2023). 

History and Observance

Bisexual Visibility Week is a yearly event that is held on September 16th through the 23rd, with the final day being ‘Celebrate Bisexuality+ Day’ (glaad.org). This celebration doesn’t change dates yearly, like some do (for instance Gay Uncles Day is the second sunday in August, leading to slight date changes wach year), and instead is always the same dates, even if this week of visibility doesn’t necessarily start on a Monday. 

According to Glaad “[i]n 2014, GLAAD co-founded and co-led the first #BiWeek with BiNet USA to draw attention to the issues faced by the bi+ community, including erasure and visibility”.

The Goal of Bisexual Visibility Week (often shortened to #BiWeek) is to “accelerate the acceptance of the bi+ (bisexual, pansexual, fluid, no label, queer, etc.) community. [As well as call] attention to the experiences, while also celebrating the resiliency of, the bisexual+ community. [This is an opportunity for] allies and bi+ people learn about the history, culture, community, and current policy priorities of bi+ communities (Glaad).

Symbols for & Stereotypes about Bisexual Pride

Bi vs Pan: There is a prevalent and pervasive myth that bisexual and pansexual identities are the same thing. This is not true, although, the Bi+ umbrella does include pansexuality within it. Pansexuality is defined as “a person whose emotional, romantic and/or physical attraction is to people inclusive of all genders” (PFLAG) whereas, Bisexuality is described as the attraction to two or more genders, to put it briefly. I discuss this stereotype in more depth in the Pansexual Awareness Week blog post

Bisexual People are Confused Another harmful stereotype about Bi people is that we are all confused about our sexuality. This comes from a monosexual-normative point of view. Bisexual individuals are also encouraged to ‘pick a side’ as a result of this mindset. While an individual may not always identify as bisexual, that does not mean that they are confused. We are all human, and sexuality is fluid and can change.

We’re all a little bi This misconception comes, most likely, from the Kinsey Scale. This research popularized the idea that sexual attraction is a scale, going from heterosexual to homosexual, with bisexual in the middle (Indiana University). While this is not necessarily what the researchers were trying to say with their findings, the popular understanding stuck, and this myth persists to this day.

The Unicorn  The unicorn shows up time and again in the queer symbolism, but in this case, it relates to the fact that bisexual individuals often feel like they are invisible, or are treated as if they don’t exist by both the queer and straight communities, rather like a mythical creature.

Unlabeled trope A common trope within media is to insist that any and all characters that experience non-monosexual attraction, hate labels. Now there’s nothing wrong with refusing to label oneself, but the continual insistence that labeling a character ‘bisexual’ is somehow a bad thing, is harmful to bisexual individuals who want and would benefit from seeing themselves in the media. 

In the mid 2010s, the CW show Arrow had the character Sara Lance, in a relationship with another female character. In an interview, it was stated that they “made it a point not to use the word ‘bisexual’ when talking about Sara. ‘We really wanted to approach it like not be salacious and be sensitive and be realistic. We actually specifically avoid using the term bisexual. We didn't want to label her at all. Let her be her own person’ (Bricker, 2014). The reasoning shared in this article is almost such an obvious example of how and why characters are left unlabeled, as opposed to identifying as bisexual that it feels fake.

Thankfully, this is becoming less and less common. In a similar article published only three years after the one quoted above, Dan Snierson interviewed Stephanie Beatriz about her character’s recent coming out as bisexual on the show Brooklyn 99. Beatriz explains that the show’s writers asked her for input surrounding Diaz’s (her character’s) coming out (2017). 

She also says towards the end of the interview “I suggested that that word [bisexual] was really important to Rosa and that it also would be really important to the bi community to have that word said aloud on TV. Not just a suggestion that she dates girls now, but a clarity on this character: This is who I am, and I’d like you to know it — and accept it” (Beatriz, Snierson, 2017) This quote suggests an awareness that Beatriz has about the reluctance show writers have had about letting characters label themselves as bisexual.

The Bi Pride Flag The bisexual pride flag is a three-strip flag that is, from top to bottom, a medium blue, a thinner purple stripe, and a darker pink on the bottom. “Created in 1998 by Michael Page… The pink represents attraction toward the same sex, and the royal blue stands for attraction toward the opposite sex. The purple band symbolizes attraction to all genders” (Outright International).

This Bisexual Pride flag is a part of the Patchwork Pride Collection by Stet Studio and can be found in my shop by clicking the photo.

Biangles  One of the oldest symbols of bi pride is the Bi triangles, or ‘biangles’ “The exact origin of the bi angles symbol is unknown, but there are theories suggesting that the colors may represent masculine, feminine, and non-binary attractions…. The lavender color where the pink and blue overlap may also be a reference to queerness, as the color lavender has long been associated with the LGBT+ community. According to Michael Page, the colors used in the bi angle’s symbol were the inspiration behind the bi pride flag” (Wilber, 2023).

Another theory  in regards to the origin of the design of the Biangles is that “[t]he overlapping pink and blue triangles are likely inspired by the pink triangle symbol sometimes used to represent the LGBT+ community, primarily gay men….  its origin [being the same deisgn] as a concentration camp badge forced upon gay men in World War II” (Wilber, 2023).

The Bisexual Double Moon The mirrored moons are back-to-back and are both colored with a gradient of same blue, purple, and pink colors as the biangles and the bi pride flag. It “was created in 1998 by Vivian Wagner specifically as an alternative to the bi angles symbol, which incorporates the pink triangle symbol associated with concentration camps” (Wilber, 2023).

Books with Bisexual Representation

The Lesbiana's Guide to Catholic School*, by Sonora Reyes was a book I recently completed, and was a wonderful read. Given the title, this book might seem like an odd choice, but one of the characters in this book is bi (no spoilers), and they specifically declare it as their identity. There is also some great bi-gay solidarity between the main character and this character. CW: homo/biphobia, self-harm, suicide, bullying, parental alienation, Catholic beliefs.

Any hyperlinks followed with an asterisk (*) indicate they are affiliate links. If you purchase something from this link, I receive a small commission from the site. It will not change the price of the product for you.

Bibliography

#biweek: Celebrate bisexuality+. GLAAD. (2023, September 11). https://glaad.org/biweek/

Berg, A. (2020, September 23). The evolution of the word “bisexual” - and why it’s still misunderstood. NBCNews.com. https://www.nbcnews.com/feature/nbc-out/evolution-word-bisexual-why-it-s-still-misunderstood-n1240832

Bi+ info: What it means to be a b(ee). Bisexual Resource Center. (n.d.). https://biresource.org/bi-info/

Bricker, T. (2014, February 6). Arrow’s gay reveal: Bosses sound off on same-sex relationship, Tease Felicity’s backstory and more. E! Online. https://www.eonline.com/news/507826/arrow-s-gay-reveal-bosses-sound-off-on-decision-to-make-spoiler-bisexual-tease-felicity-s-backstory-and-more

Donnelly, A., & Fuller, K. (2023, July 12). What does it mean to be monosexual?. ChoosingTherapy.com. https://www.choosingtherapy.com/monosexual/

Flags of the LGBTIQ community. Outright International. (n.d.). https://outrightinternational.org/insights/flags-lgbtiq-community#:~:text=Created%20in%201998%20by%20Michael,symbolizes%20attraction%20to%20all%20genders.

Indiana University. (n.d.).  The Kinsey Scale. Kinsey Institute. https://kinseyinstitute.org/research/publications/kinsey-scale.php

Lesbian Visibility Week: A Week of WLW Love

Lesbian Awareness Week occurs for the final full week of the month of April, and this year that is from the 22nd to the 27th.

This sunset pride flag is a part of my Patchwork Pride collection, and can be purchased in my shop.

History and Observance

This week-long even is relatively new, despite having been “first celebrated in mid-July in 1990, and was conceived out of lesbians' frustrations with the higher visibility of LGBT men than LBGT women… The week was coordinated by West Hollywood Lesbian Visibility Committee and the Los Angeles Gay and Lesbian Center and devoted to raising awareness of lesbian identities and topics and celebrating the lesbian community” (Heckin’ Unicorn, 2023).

After a few years, Lesbian Visibility Week became less as less widespread. In 2008 Lesbian Visibility was established, but the week long celebration was only resume in 2020, thanks to However, after 1992, the week fell off until International Lesbian Visibility Day came to be in 2008. A whole week still didn’t exist again until 2020 when Linda Riley, the publisher of DIVA Magazine, (re)founded Lesbian Awareness Week (Vargas, 2024).

Lesbian Pride Symbols and Terminology

Double Venus: The venus symbol, which is often used to denote female, is duplicated and interlocked (De Montfort)

Labrys Pride Flag: “The first well-documented design for a lesbian pride flag… designed by a gay graphic designer named Sean Campbell in 1999. The Labrys Flag features a white double-headed axe, called a labrys, superimposed on top of an inverted black triangle with a purple background” (Bauer, 2023). The Purple background is connected to Sappho who wrote about girls with wreathes of violets on their heads. The Black triangle is a symbol that was used by the Nazis to label lesbians, along with other groups, as ‘asocial’ during the holocaust. The labrys is connected to the Amazons, a mythical race of warrior women who were considered to be lesbians.

Lipstick Lesbian Pride Flag: “Created by blogger Natalie McCray in 2010, [and also known as the Pink Lesbian Pride flag], this flag features seven stripes in various shades of red and pink with a lipstick mark placed in the top left corner (Bauer, 2023). This flag fell out of use as many lesbians who were butch, or generally less femme, did not identify with the colors and design of the flag. It was further abandoned by the community when, in the late twenty teens, the creators bigoted opinions became more widely known (Bauer, 2023)

Sapphic: “an umbrella term that includes lesbian, bisexual, and pansexual trans femmes, mascs, nonbinary folks, and cis women…. "sapphic" strives to conjure an experience more akin to an intention toward attraction — one oriented less to any specific gender identity and more to the fullness of a potential lovers' humanity” (Hamou, 2022). The term originates from the ancient Greek poet Sappho of Lesbos, who wrote poetry about her love for women.

Sunset Pride Flag: “created by a nonbinary lesbian named Emily Gwen in 2018….[There were initially] seven stripes in a gradient of orange to pink…” (Bauer 2023). From top to bottom: dark orange represents gender nonconformity, coral; independence, pale orange; community, white; unique relationships to womanhood, pinkish purple for serenity and peace, darker purple-pink for love and sex, and finally deep magenta represents femininity (Bauer, 2023). This version might be one of the most widely-used versions of the lesbian flag today, whether in its seven-stripe or simplified five-stripe form (Bauer, 2023).

This sunset pride flag is a part of my Patchwork Pride collection, and can be purchased in my shop.

Toaster Oven: A reference to the episode of the sit-com ‘Ellen’, where it is mentioned to Ellen DeGenerous’ character (who does come out in the episode) that if a lesbian recruits a straight woman she is gifted a toaster oven (Devil’s Food Cake, 2011)

Violets: A symbol that comes for Sappho’s poetry about her love for women. The violet was made into a modern symbol for lesbian love by Édouard Bourdet in his 1927 play; “The Captive” (University of Washington, 2021).

WLW: An acronym that means ‘women loving women’ or ‘women (who) love women’.

A Book with Lesbian Representation

Deus Ex Mechanic* is the first book in The Cricket Chronicles, written by Ryann Fletcher. The main character Alice is the best mechanic in the Galaxy, (and also a lesbian). She unwillingly joins a pirate crew, led by the beautiful and powerful Violet. She finds herself falling for her new captain as well as reconsidering everything she knows about the Coalition. 

I admit, Ryann is a friend of mine, but I absolutely love the crew of the Cricket, and this book is a wonderful representation of a sapphic romance. The cast of characters is diverse in many ways, and the writing is great. This book is definitely worth a read if you enjoy Becky Chambers’ work, and want a sweet Sapphic read. 

Any hyperlinks followed with an asterisk (*) indicate that they are affiliate links. This means that if you purchase something from this link, I receive a small commission from the site. It will not change the price of the product for you.

Bibliography

Bauer, E. (2023, June 23). A brief and very online history of the Lesbian Pride Flag. Them. https://www.them.us/story/history-of-the-lesbian-pride-flag

De Montfort University Leicester . (n.d.). LGBTQ+ Symbols & Meanings. De Montfort University Leicester . https://www.dmu.ac.uk/events/pride/symbols.aspx#:~:text=The%20double%20Venus%20symbol%20takes,symbol%20for%20the%20lesbian%20community.

Devil’s Food Cake. (2011, February 14). Gay slang vol. 5: Toaster oven. The Most Cake. https://themostcake.co.uk/we-like/gay-slang-vol-5-toaster-oven/

Hamou, Y. (2022, April 27). What does it mean to be sapphic?. Them. https://www.them.us/story/what-does-sapphic-mean

Unicorn, H. (2023, December 18). When is Lesbian Visibility Week 2024 and what does it mean?. Heckin’ Unicorn. https://heckinunicorn.com/blogs/heckin-unicorn-blog/when-is-lesbian-visibility-week-2024-and-what-does-it-mean?currency=USD

Vargas, A. (2024, February 1). When is Lesbian Visibility Week 2024? all about it - parade. Parade. https://parade.com/living/what-is-lesbian-visibility-week

What is Asexuality? | International Asexuality Day & Ace Symbols

While Ace Week takes place in October, International Asexuality Day is coming up on April 6th, and just like Aromantic Spectrum Awareness Week back in February, I thought now would be a good time to talk about IAD and what it means to be on the Asexual spectrum.

What is Asexuality?

Abrosexual: “a term that describes a kind of sexual fluidity. Someone who’s abrosexual finds that their sexual attracttion [sic] shifts often: they might identify with the term ‘gay,’ and later feel attracted to people of all genders, and then feel little to no sexual attraction at all” (Ferguson, 2022).

Acespec: An abbreviation that means Asexual Spectum. Used to refer to all the identities that fall on the asexual spectrum.

Aceflux: “Individuals whose sexual orientation fluctuates along the spectrum between asexual and sexual” (OkCupid).

Aegosexual: “people who experience a disconnect between themselves and the subject of arousal. This enables them to experience sexual attraction, arousal, and desire in response to sexual stimuli, yet they have little or no desire to engage in sexual activity with anyone…. first called autochorissexuality back in 2012 by Dr. Anthony Bogaert” (Lavenia & Rosalin, 2022).

Allosexual (Allo): “An adjective used to describe a person who experiences sexual attraction to others, and is not asexual” (Glaad, 2023).

Apothisexual: Individuals who are repulsed at the idea of sexual interactions that involve them. The term ‘sex repulsed’ is often used interchangeably. (Leitner, 2022)

Asexual (Ace): “experience little to no sexual attraction to others. Aces can experience other forms of attraction, like romantic, sensual or aesthetic attraction, and can still engage in sexual activity if they choose to for various reasons despite not feeling sexual desire” (Seattle Pride, 20223).

Autosexual: “This sexual orientation refers to people who feel a sexual attraction toward themselves, one that surpasses your standard dose of “self-love.” In autosexuality, your primary sexual attraction is for the one and only YOU” (Hsieh & Engle, 2023).

Cupiosexual: Individuals who desire sexual experiences or a sexual relationship with someone but doesn’t experience sexual attraction. A relatively new term, believed to be coined in 2014. (Hsieh & Kibbe, 2023)

Demisexual (Demi): People who are demisexual “only experience sexual attraction once they form a strong emotional connection with another person” (Seattle Pride, 2023)

Fraysexual: Individuals that are only sexually attracted to those they do not have an emotional connection with. Once such a bond begins to form the sexual attract will begin to diminish. Often described as the opposite of Demisexual (Glassman-Hughes, 2022)

Greysexual (Grey Ace): This identity is “characterized by being asexual while also being able to experience or have previously experienced sexual attraction. This could appear in sexual attraction that is low in intensity, infrequent, ambiguous or only direction toward specific people” (Seattle Pride, 2023).

Lithosexual: “a person who experiences sexual attraction but does not want it reciprocated” (View, 2019).

History and Observance

International Asexuality Day is a new day of recognition, having only been established in 2021 (International Asexuality Day). It is April 6th, which was chosen “to avoid clashes with other significant dates around the world and to fit in with the constraints of the participating organisations as far as possible” (International Asexuality Day).

International Asexuality Day “does not belong to one particular organisation, being a collaboration between different international ace groups” (International Asexuality Day).

There is a strong focus on the part of the organizers to ensure that this day is not US-centric and is accessible to ace individuals around the world. The day is designed to complement other ace events like Ace Week (the last week in October), but with a special emphasis on the international community, going beyond the anglophone and Western sphere that has so far had the most coverage (International Asexuality Day).

The four themes of International Asexuality Day are advocacy, celebration, education, and solidarity (international asexuality day.org) These themes can be promoted in whatever way you want, whether you fall under the asexual spectrum, or are an ally. A simple photo post talking about your identity or support of Ace individuals or sharing information about the AceSpec identities (like this blog post!) can be a great way to mark the date.

Symbols of Asexual Pride

The most obvious symbol for asexual pride is the ace pride flag. From top to bottom it has a black stripe, a grey stripe, a white stripe, and purple stirpes. “The black stripe represents asexuality, the grey stripe represents grey-sexuality, the white stripe represents sexuality, and the purple stripe represents the a-spectrum community” (Asexuality Handbook). In this case, the term ‘a-spectrum refers to both asexual individuals and aromantic individuals and those within their individual spectrums. “The Asexual Pride flag was created in 2010 online via a popular vote led by the Asexuality and Visibility Education Network, AKA AVEN” (Elle, 2021).

An asexual pride flag from my Patchwork Pride collection. This flag is available for purchase in my shop. You can find the flag by clicking on the photo.

Another of the most common symbols of Asexual pride is the black ring. This specific “black ring [is] worn on the middle finger of the right hand… [and provide] a discreet visual clue that the people around them may also be asexual” (Asexuality handbook.com) either in the instance that a person is not comfortable being entirely out as asexual, or perhaps wants to be connected to the asexual community in this way, or both!

The black ring, as a symbol has evolved over time. It “originated from a 2005 AVEN thread, being a subversion of the traditional wedding band that demonstrated a rejection traditional relationship values” (Asexuality Handbook). This is an understandable impulse, as sex is often considered a requirement of a marriage, healthy or not.

However, asexual individuals can get married if they so desire, and can even enjoy sex and the intimacy it brings. Understanding this, in “the broader community the ring has never carried any such connotation” (Asexuality Handbook).

Phot of an Ace Ring by Eli Christman

Cake is another well-known symbol within the asexual community. “Cake is used as a symbol for asexuality by allusion to the common observation that asexuals prefer cake to sex. Although some asexuals may enjoy sex more than cake, the observation highlights how many asexuals see sex as something ordinary, like eating a cake. Other foods may be used instead with the same intended effect, notably garlic bread” (Asexuality Handbook)

The ace of spades is an obvious symbol. ‘Ace’ is an abbreviation of the word asexual, and is a playing card. Each suit has its own meaning, even if each of these sub-meanings isn’t as well known. The ace of hearts represents alloromantic aces, spades are for aromantic aces, diamonds represent demisexuals / greysexuals, and clubs are for questioning aces (Elle, 2021)

Similar to the gryphon being a symbol of aromatic pride, the dragon is a symbol of asexual pride. “While nobody seems to have a clear answer of where this symbol came from, it is said that it started as a joke on Tumblr…. Mythical creatures are often used to represent the ace community as aces feel that they are like mythical creatures, because society doesn’t always feel like we exist” (asexuals.net, 2022).

Books with Asexual Representation

Just like last time, I wanted to share a book with ace representation at the end of this post. This time I picked Every Heart a Doorway by Seanan McGuire. I love Seanan McGuire’s books so much, and her Wayward Children series is no exception. In this book, the main character, Nancy talks about her preference for relationships of the romantic sort, like flirting and other romantic connections, but also that she doesn’t want anything beyond that in terms of relationships. This suggests that Nancy is asexual and allometric. Any hyperlinks followed with an asterisk (*) indicate that they are affiliate links. This means that if you purchase something from this link, I receive a small commission from the site. It will not change the price of the product for you.

Bibliography

Asexual symbols explained: Learn more about asexuality on asexuals.net. Asexuals.net. (2022, March 9). https://www.asexuals.net/asexual-symbol-explained/

Asexual Symbols. Asexuality Handbook. (n.d.). https://www.asexuality-handbook.com/asexual-symbols

Elle. (2021, October 24). A short guide to asexuality. Rainbow & Co. https://rainbowandco.uk/blogs/what-were-saying/a-short-guide-to-asexuality

Ferguson, S. (2022, May 27). 10 abrosexual faqs: Meaning, signs, dating. Healthline. https://www.healthline.com/health/abrosexual#definition

GLAAD. (2023, May 1). Glossary of terms: LGBTQ. GLAAD. https://glaad.org/reference/terms/

Glassman-Hughes, E. (2022, May 6). Fraysexuality can be misunderstood. here’s what you need to know. Sexopedia. https://www.cosmopolitan.com/sexopedia/a39927546/what-is-fraysexuality/

Hsieh, C., & Engle, G. (2023, December 19). Here’s What It Means to Be Autosexual. Sexopedia. https://www.cosmopolitan.com/sexopedia/a32700577/autosexual-definition/

Hsieh, C., & Kibbe, K. (2023, August 23). Cupiosexual definition - what is cupiosexuality?. Sexopedia. https://www.cosmopolitan.com/sexopedia/a35046096/cupiosexual/

International Asexuality Day (IAD). (n.d.). International asexuality day. International Asexuality Day (IAD). https://internationalasexualityday.org/en/

Lavenia, A., & Rosalin, D. (2022, November 9). Aegosexuality: What is it and the history behind it. inspire. https://www.cxomedia.id/human-stories/20221109131918-74-176990/aegosexuality-what-is-it-and-the-history-behind-it#:~:text=Aegosexual%20classifies%20people%20who%20experience,in%20sexual%20activity%20with%20anyone

LEITNER, B. (2022, December 6). Apothisexuality explains why some folks are repulsed by sex. Sexopedia. https://www.cosmopolitan.com/sexopedia/a42160151/apothisexual/

Okcupid. (n.d.). Identity: Orientation and gender expressions. Okcupid. https://www.okcupid.com/identity/

Seattlepride. (2023, April 5). International asexuality day: Three ways to be an ally to the asexual community: News: Seattle pride. Seattle Pride. https://seattlepride.org/news/international-asexuality-day-three-ways-to-be-an-ally-to-the-asexual-community#:~:text=International%20Asexuality%20Day%20(IAD)%20takes,asexual%2C%20demisexual%20and%20greysexual%20individuals.

View, T. (2019, August 15). Everything you need to know about lithosexuality. Live Love LGBTQ+. https://livelovelgbtq.wordpress.com/2017/10/26/lithosexual/

What Does it Mean to be Aromantic?

Aromantic Spectrum Awareness Week is now upon us, so I thought this would be a good time to share a bit about what it means, exactly to be aromantic.

These four flags, asexual, demiromantic, aromantic, and demisexual respectively, are all a part of my Patchwork Pride flag collection, which can be found by clicking on this photo.

What is Aromantic?

Lithoromantic: “an individual who feels romantic love towards someone but has no desire of having these feelings reciprocated. It’s also known as… romantic. This term also falls under the aromantic spectrum…” (Pace, 2023)

Alloromantic: “people who experience romantic feelings for one or more individuals” (PIÑEIRO, 2021)

Aromantic: A person who does not experience romantic attraction towards others. It is also the name for the spectrum that encapsulates all the identities relating to not feeling romantic attraction towards people in some form.

Arospec: an abbreviation for the term aromantic spectrum. It is often used by people as a shorthand way to explain that they fall somewhere on the aromantic Spectrum.

Asexual: A person who does not experience sexual attraction to others. It is also, like aromantic, the name for the spectrum that encapsulates all the identities relating to not feeling sexual attraction towards people in some form.

Demiromantic: “Only experience romantic attraction after forming a strong emotional connection with someone”. (very well mind)

Greyromantic: “People who are greyromantic experience romantic attraction, but not as frequently or intensely as alloromantic individuals. This can overlap with lithromanticism to some extent - a person might identify as both - but not all greyromantic individuals are lithromantic” (Ohwovoriole, 2023 )

History and Observance

The first observation of Aromantic Awareness Week was held "November 10th-17th in 2014, under the name Aromantic Awareness Week; in 2015” (Aromantic-Official, AUREA).

Aromantic Spectrum Awareness Week (abbreviated as ASAW) is now held on “the first full week (starting Sunday) following Valentine’s Day” (Aromantic-Official, AUREA). For 2024 that means that ASAW will be from the 18th to the 24th.

Symbols for Aromantic Pride

A “[w]hite ring worn on the middle finger is often worn by people who identify as someone on the aromantic spectrum” (Symbols of the ace-spectrum)

A symbol that overlaps the asexual and aromantic communities is the “[a]ce of Spades [which] is often used by asexuals who identify as someone on the aromantic spectrum” (Symbols of the ace-spectrum)

The Ace of Spades is a symbol of pride within both the Aromantic and Asexual Communities.

There have been multiple iterations of the Aromantic Pride flag. The one that is used by the arospec community currently “was created by Cameron Whimsy in 2014…. The color green was chosen to symbolize the aromanticism as the opposite of red, the color which is the most commonly associated with the romance” (Aromantic flag and symbols explained).

As with all pride flags, each of the colors has a meaning. As mentioned above the greens represent the aromantic spectrum itself, and were chosen to be as far opposite from the traditional colors of romance as possible. The white stripe represents platonic and aesthetic attraction, and the grey and black represent the spectrum that acknowledges the spectrum of sexuality that aromantic individuals also inhabit (Aromantic flag and symbols explained).

This Aromantic Pride flag is a part of the Patchwork Pride Collection by Stet Studio and can be found in my shop by clicking the photo.

The first Aromantic pride flag “which is no longer used… was created around 2011, on the website of the National Coalition for Aromantic Visibility. The flag received a lot of criticism as it didn’t seem to include the full aromantic spectrum, yet included alloromantic people” (Aromantic flag and symbols explained).

The colors of this pride flag were green for aromantics, yellow for romantic friendships and dating, orange for lithoromantics, and black for romantics who reject traditional romantic culture (Aromantic flag and symbols explained).

The original design of the Aromantic Pride flag, created in 2011.

The arrow (like you shoot out of a bow) is a symbol used by most aromantics to show their pride in their identity, simply because ‘aro’ sounds like ‘arrow’.

‘Arrow’ and ‘aro’ sound so similar that it has become a a symbol of aromantic pride.

Hearts might not be one's first guess for aromantic pride symbols, after all, hearts are pretty romantic, right? Well, I think these next two symbols are a great reminder that hearts, and love, do not need to be romantic. “A completely green heart or a heart with the aromantic flag on it, is also often used as a symbol for the community…. people on social media use the green heart emoji as this is used to indicate aromanticism. You will often see the green heart emoji given as a response in the comment section of videos about aromanticism” (Aromantic flag and symbols explained).

Yellow flowers are a symbol of aromanticism because “in the world of flowers, the color yellow means friendship… [and] can also symbolize happiness, joy and new beginnings” (Aromantic flag and symbols explained). Another great reminder of the types of love beyond romantic.

Because of the meanings associated with yellow flowers in floral language they have become a symbol of aromantic pride.

Another symbol that is intertwined with the asexual community, is the gryphon. The dragon is a symbol for the asexual community, both are mythological creatures and they represent the feeling of invisibility both communities often experience, especially when those who aren’t a part of these communities insist that these identities do not exist (Aromantic flags and symbols explained)

Books with Aromantic Representation

As a book-lover myself, I would be remiss if I didn't include a book with Aromantic representation. I recently read the book Kaikeyi: A Novel by Vaishnavi Patel*, which is a retelling of the story from the Ramayana. I found Kaikeyi, herself, to be Aromantic (and asexual). She mentions multiple times not feeling the way her husband's other wives do towards their husband or anyone at all. She also speaks of loving him, instead, dearly as a friend.

Any hyperlinks followed with an asterisk (*) indicate they are affiliate links. If you purchase something from this link, I receive a small commission from the site. It will not change the price of the product for you.

Bibliography

Aromantic flag and symbols explained. Asexuals.net. (2022, July 16). https://www.asexuals.net/aromantic-flag-and-symbols-explained/#aromanticflag

Aromantic-Official, AUREA. (n.d.). About asaw. Aromantic Spectrum Awareness Week. https://www.arospecweek.org/about-asaw/

Ohwovoriole, T. (2023, August 9). What it means to be Lithromantic. Verywell Mind. https://www.verywellmind.com/what-it-means-to-be-lithromantic-7567805

Pace, R. (2023, July 19). Lithromantic: What it is, WHAT MAKES ONE & 15 signs you may be one. Marriage Advice - Expert Marriage Tips & Advice. https://www.marriage.com/advice/relationship/signs-of-lithromantic/#:~:text=The%20term%20lithromantic%20refers%20to,to%20be%20in%20a%20relationship

PIÑEIRO, S. M. C. (2021, May 18). Alloromantic: Everything you’ve ever wanted to know about what it means to be alloromantic. Cosmopolitan. https://www.cosmopolitan.com/sexopedia/a36461835/alloromantic-definition/

Symbols of the ace-spectrum. Kent State University. (n.d.). https://www.kent.edu/lgbtq/symbols-ace-spectrum#:~:text=White%20ring%20worn%20on%20the,asexuals%20who%20identify%20as%20alloromantic.